Roxy ~ A Different Sort Of Girl

Meet Roxy, a woman I met recently.  She’s a girl, a girl with a difference.

The difference is she was born into the world as a biological male.  She refers to herself as a part time Transgender girl (T-girl).  For most daily activities she chooses to live and function as “Mike”, a male persona I have yet to meet, to protect her female identity from work, family, and male friends.  She frequently however, goes out as a woman, “Roxy,” primarily in social situations.

Roxy IMG_9244 05/30/2015

Roxy ~ Sexy Secretary 

With the coming out of Caitlyn (the woman formerly known as Bruce) Jenner and much activism regarding gay rights and gender equality more people are becoming aware, if not more knowledgeable, about the transgender community.  It seems however the headlines are more frequently made by those like Jenner who make the switch from their biological gender to the other sex full time, often undergoing painful and expensive hormone therapies and surgeries to appear more like the sex they desire to be.

Roxy says, and she is more of an authority than I, those like her who are trans part time as a woman, but function primarily as a man are far more common and the primary majority of trans male to female community, than those who take drastic measures like hormone therapy and surgery to change their gender full time.  That is not to suggest those who do so are doing something wrong, far from it, as many in the medical community believe that desire is something you are born with and most discover this desire in youth before reaching puberty.  If a person feels so strongly their biological gender does not match who they believe they really are, then no one should question what they do to become more comfortable with their bodies.

Roxy, and others like her, have no desire to switch full time and permanently.  They either enjoy living with both gender roles like Roxy, or they fear oppression at work and/or from family, and also fear a potential loss of life-long relationships if they come out as a full-time woman.  As Roxy’s male persona, Mike embraces his masculine side and in daily life most often lives as a man while working, competing in sports, participating in family matters, and pursuing life’s normal activities.  However, for him that is not enough.

Particularly when socializing Mike becomes Roxy.  Roxy embraces the feminine side of the same person, thoroughly enjoys letting it out, and as she puts it “creating the illusion of being a real woman.”  On the weekends she goes out for a night on the town in her female persona sometimes on a date with a man, a party with other T-girls, or to certain GBLT clubs where people don’t question a person’s gender identity.

I first met Roxy when a mutual friend introduced us at a burlesque performance we both attended.  We became much better acquainted when she recently commissioned me to do a photoshoot with her.  I have seen other T-girls. There are some I consider friends, and I’ve even photographed a couple, but this is the first time I have done a model shoot of this depth with any of them.

We easily became comfortable with each other, and made what I think are some great images.  Roxy seems to agree, as she is pleased with the pictures and especially with the positive feedback she has been receiving both from other T-girls and generally from open-minded people of all sexual persuasions.

While the photoshoot was enjoyable, our time together quickly became about much more than just making pictures.  Roxy was extremely open with me about her dual gender identity and mentioned “Native American” people called people like her “Two Spirit” beings who could balance both the male/female energy in one body.  They were thought to be sacred in some tribes as they could relate to all tribe members equally and thus considered most able to judge tribal matters.

While shooting and while taking a break for lunch she discussed her life in great detail.  I became privy to the history of how she began crossdressing as a young boy, first as a joke when her mom dressed him as a girl to see if he resembled his sister.  This is when something clicked.  What he thought he would hate, being dressed up as a silly girl at age 12, he ended up liking and repeated every chance he could by dressing secretly in his mom’s clothing.

Roxy further told about the activities she is involved in as an adult, and even discussed some information about how the psychiatric/psychology communities classify T-girls into different categories and explained why so many come out late in life as women like her. Her male persona, Mike,  had previously married genetic women and even fathered a now adult daughter.  For the majority of her life Roxy dressed in secret with no one other than herself knowing until after her last divorce from a woman.  She then decided it was time for the female persona to emerge into public view and “Roxy” was introduced to the world in October 2010 at a GBLT club.

My day with Roxy turned out to be educational as well as fun as she gave me an intimate glimpse into a world I had in the past viewed only superficially from the outside.

We have since discussed getting together and continuing our conversation.  Hopefully we will make that happen, and when we do, with Roxy’s permission, I shall share more about a subculture that many of us know exists, but few of us have seen up close.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dave Michael, author
In collaboration with Roxy Stevens
Images and text Copyright 2015 Dave Michael.
No portion of this article may be reproduced without permission of the author.

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One Response to “Roxy ~ A Different Sort Of Girl”

  1. georgiakevin Says:

    Your post is both insightful and well written. Roxy seems like a very interesting and captivating girl!

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